was thinkin whether to or not to blog.
coz i realli have no idea what i realli want to.
perhaps thats the main reason why everything always hang in the air.
i dunwan to stay this way.
i wan more.
im not contented with what i have.
every area.
i seriously have no idea what do i want.
studies and relationship.
indeed i have not been doin well in my studies.
and havin to repeat every single module of my year 2 is realli a toopid thing..
as for relationship.
being an indecisive person makes myself, the other party and ppl ard me suffer.
but in actually fact.
im juz being a naive person who believes in those fairy tales.
coz im a easily cheated person.
thus ppl are climbin over me?..
totally no idea.
as for my attachment.
i shld say.
im disappointed.
i believe i can do better.
i wanted to prove myself everyday.
but i juz mess everything up.
am i realli such a failure?!
maybe im one.
i totally have no idea what will i become..
im no longer young.
when 7th Dec 2006 comes.
im no longer a teenager anymore.
and yet im still such a childish person.
useless bum isnt it.
haiz.
my headache these few days almost killed me.
i wanted to pop pills.
but i juz stop myself..
coz i dunwanna get addicted and dependant on them.
1 panadols will take 7yrs to digest.
and i have pop way too much last yr.
i may look as though im juz like normal person.
but seriously i dun think im deep inside.
im juz a weird person.
duhx.
but hw weird can i be.
i duno.
sometimes i juz feel tat im juz like a parasite.
livin in this earth and snatchin oxygen with other ppl..
and waste the food on earth.
some of them cant even have a proper meal.
but me.
havin them and yet still acts like a parasite.
whatever it is.
i seriously duno.
haiz..
what a demoralisin post isnt it.
ha!!
i wanna drink Bailey's Irish Cream.
but i juz cant find it..
why.
is this liquor realli tat difficult to find..
haiz.
whatever.
bye bloggie.
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